In limbo.

I'm pretty dissapointed as to how my first class ended up... It is a challenge working full time then heading to class 4 nights a week. I try to squeeze in as much study time as I can during the day and by the time I get home, I'm exhausted. I didnt get the A that I wanted... I didnt get that B either. ....

So here is where i am now: I'm trying to register for another class in the fall, but since im a non degree seeking student, I get last dibs on registering, which means it can go either way. As of now, I still have a hold on my account. If I'm not able to register this fall, im screwed. This is all going to take a while... one class per semester? I'll be 50 by the time I finish these prereqs.

I'm not a happy camper now. I feel like this whole experience so far has been one giant prank. A joke. I feel like the joke. But I'm not going to give up - I am allowed to bitch along the way though :)
Anyways, so next on the schedule, I'll have to keep my fingers crossed that this hold will be removed so I can register. They said to check back around the 2nd week in august.

On the other end of things, my job pretty much plateaued..working in a lab is either one extreme or another. Either its extremely busy, or extremely slow. And right now, its extremely slow. I think next week we are starting a new experiment, so hopefully that will amp things up a little.

I need a vacation. I need to go some place peaceful and just relax.

Time for a snack, then bed time.

1st Exam

I'll chalk it up to nerves. Thats what it has to be. Otherwise I wouldnt have gotten a 9/17 on my first exam.... Yes, a 9/17. Plus an extra 5 points because I turned in my homework problems. What on EARTH is going on here?? Did I study my ass off? Yes!

I'm thinking I put too much emphasis on certain things, and not enough on others. Calculations drive me crazy, so I had to hit that section hard. I mean, I beat the shit out of it. Buuuuut I blew the other questions. Alright so this is the plan for my next test (which is on Tuesday - after the long weekend in which I should be relaxing and not studying): I'm going to evenly cover all the sections. Keep going over problems. I'm going to go over them to the point where I can work them in my SLEEP.



I want this badly.


In fact, I should be studying now, but I'm exhausted. Why? I'm supposed to be in Miami at the moment but I'm back on my couch.... my flight got canceled this afternoon. It was cancelled after we were all comfortably seated in the airplane, backed out onto the runway, and I was half asleep. I was even doing the head-bob.

Ladies and gentleman, this is your captain speaking. We're sorry for the delay but we've just received word from control that this flight has been canceled... * Children cry, people gasp, everyones phone starts beeping as people frantically text and call their friends and relatives. After the let us off the airplane, I took a cab back home, and here I am.

I'll update again after my exam on Tuesday.

1st week

alright, I can finally put the first week of school behind me. It went well, I think. But, let me define "well."

1) I'm following what we are doing in class. Granted even if it is only solving for the density of a substance and doing metric conversions. It's a start.

2) I'm participating. I feel like it sucks the life out of me, but I try.

3) I havent been cursed with the lab partner from hell. At least, so far. He's a nice kid, Alex. It's his second time taking the course and the professor seems to joke with him a lot about him "having his hands in his pockets the entire time." I've always been proactive during lab so hopefully i can motivate him to be the same way.

I still need to get my textbook. Guilty. I know. Its just that...its just that the school bookstore closes like a half hour before I get out of work. So I should get my lab partner to buy one for me and I'll pay him back. (Since he apparently likes waking up at 2pm, I assume he doesnt have a job)


Okay, no excuses I know.

My class is a mix of people, most of them are "the right age" to be there. Some are taking Chem 1 for the first time and there are some who are on round two. I noticed a girl behind me that is a bit older than I am. I believe she's taken chem before but I dont remember why shes back. Career change, maybe.

My head hurts. I just had a tofu ice cream sandwich, my Netflix isnt loading on my tv, and I'm antsy. I'm tired but I dont want to go to sleep. Maybe I'll just get in bed and try to read.

Day 2

So I figured (despite how exhausted I am) that I should at least type up a little something considering its my second day back in school. How do I feel about it all so far? Comfortable. Not TOO comfortable. My mind is clear, my goals are clear, got my book, my calculator, my notes. The rest is up to me.

I felt giddy waiting for class to start. I havent been giddy about anything in a while except maybe getting out of work early, or when my Netflix comes in the mail.

I'm sitting in the front of the class this time, as opposed to all the way in the back corner, slouched against the wall where no one could see me sleep. I'm participating, too. I was never a proactive student, but rumor has it that this prof takes notice to those who participate. I'll be raising my hand a lot more, thank you very much.

On a side note, miraculously, I didnt get lost finding the building on the first day. Okay well I'll have to give credit to the other clueless girl roaming around campus. We put out brains together and made it to Smith Hall without incident.

Time to put my eye cream on, take my blood pressure pills, and get the heck in bed.

PAID IN FULL!!

A new chapter has begun (again) !!!! I paid for my course - Gen Chem 1 lab/lecture. It's set in stone, I'm finally on the move again! I told my friend that I am retaking the classes and she said, boy you never give up do you? Nope! :)
I have mixed feelings of excitement and nervousness. Completely normal, but I'm so looking forward to starting the adventures :) May 31st!

courses?

Now I'm debating whether or not to take this chemistry course starting May. It's a summer course so yes, it's going to be quick quick quick. And well, I'm not sure I can handle a speed chem course like that. I think the odds would be against me (based on past experiences of course)...I thought I should give it a go at one point but I cant make the same mistake I've always made: putting too much on my plate. Yes, it's only one class for starters, but im also working a full time job so... At least I"ll have the opportunity to take it in the Fall if I decide...

Chemistry

Finally some academic progress :) I signed up for a Gen Chem I class that begins in May. It's a quick, three month minimester - which means it'll be fast paced. I can do it.

I've been bitching a moaning about not being able to find class times that would jive with my work schedule. Leave it to my coworker to notice that the times said 7PM not 7AM. That makes all the difference now doesnt it? ...

I cant wait till Friday....

Pre-Saint Pattys Day

I'm going to miss green beer this year. I've stopped drinking so the least I can do is add food coloring to my ginger ale. Oh, I dont drink soda either. This time last year I was in San Francisco with my ex (who is now engaged) Dammit. Really though I've never been much of a west coast fan, but the trolly ride was fabulous.

Anyways, I'm thrilled that tomorrow is Thursday...that means the day after is Friday! This weekend will be great, our ambulance unit is going out on Saturday so I get to spend the whole afternoon/evening "EMTing" around southern maryland. :) :)

Until then....
:)

The Adventure Begins .... Again.

So the situation has changed ever so slightly... I like the direction it's going though. I feel a lot better about this pursuit. I met with the faculty member from the Medical Illustration program that my boss (who says he loves my artwork) set me up with. The meeting went well - although it wasnt an interview, I had to keep reminding myself that. My nerves were on edge. I guess thats the way I get when I meet people for the first time in general.

Bill, (we'll call him Bill) gave me some critiques about my artwork, we chatted about the program a little bit, he gave me a tour and told me he'll see me in two years when I apply. I had told him that I needed to build my application a bit.. Okay, well between you (the computer) and me, i really dont have any intention of applying. BUT I feel like someone finally validated the time that I wanted to set aside to retake my classes. I think thats all I needed to hear.

I constantly feel "too old to start anything new" but I know it's not true.. I just need to stay focused and if it takes me two years to complete the courses I need , then so be it. I was so hard pressed on doing as much as I can as fast as I could and i never got anywhere. I just have to slow down and stay on the path..

Feeling Good!

My mom is here visiting for the weekend.. we did some shopping, went out to eat, and had one of "those" conversations in the car on the way home. Well, we started talking about my living situation and when I would buy a house etc... The realization that time is of the essence, set in. Ideally i told her that I wanted to get "into a program and into a house" by the time I'm thirty. Why is this good news? I think that I"m more comfortable knowing that if I can stay focused, I can get things done. I'm not in any rush, my resources and tools are out there - i just need to use them to my advantage.

The Plot Thickens

I"m just taking a few minutes here to vent. We had 12 laminectomys to do this afternoon along with - 12 tattoos (on the tails of the mice to number them) - 12 contusions - and of course, 12 pre and post op duties. So of course, between 3 of us down there, we had to delegate responsibilities to make things flow smoother.

I went downstairs early to set up the anaesthesia station, the contusion station, and the laminectomy station - which, with all of the tubes, tools, and filters, takes at least 20 minutes. Casually, my partner decides to come downstairs a half hour later. I offered to do the laminectomys on the mice. I could bang em out. I've gotten enough practice - and since this was for a legit study I figured I would put myself out there, show them I could do it. And I did. I nailed 11/12 of them. (I accidentally hit the spinal cord on the 9th one) :o( .... No worries, things still were okay.

So when things started to pick up, I had to tattoo AND do the surgeries, which was doable, I made it work, no prob. When I'm asked to do something and I'm into it, I do it 110%. I would have at least hoped that my coworker would put in some effort as well. This is what happened:

Me: Hey, do you mind cleaning up these instruments while I put this stuff away?

Him: *laughs and starts to walk away* You mean YOUR instruments??

Me: Seriously? Is that too much to ask?

Him: ......

Me: I came down here early to set up, and just did 12 laminectomys and you cant rinse a couple of tools? Yes? No?

Him: *mumbles something and takes the tools*

I mean, this is the kind of mentality that drives me nuts. He does things in this apathetic, half ass, lazy, dull, clueless, lame frat boy way and it drives me nuts. He's like a lame donkey. He burrows under the ass (no pun) of the only other male research tech in the lab and acts as though he needs that to function. I ask nothing of him, yet he acts as though I owe him everything. Unreal.


I feel better now that I got that out of my system.

Post Bacc Bummer

So I've investigated the post bacc programs in my area - well in the whole state, there are only 2. Either way, I dont qualify. Basically, i've already taken more than two pre-req classes and apparently the program is geared toward people who havent taken any at all. What about people who want to retake the classes?? Or have only a handfull left to take! I think I've already answered my own question, I"m just a bit frustrated with the situation. I would much rather be in an organized program to get it all over with rather than take the courses piece by piece.

Well, its a beautiful day today. I was going to drive to NY to pick up some stuff at the other apartment but I remembered that it's Presidents Day weekend. Traffic is going to be a bitch. Plus I got home late last night from riding the unit so I didnt think it was ultimately worth it. I'm going to plan on going next weekend... I can finally add some furnishing to my apartment here! No more bare white walls :)

On that note, time to take care of laundry, eat lunch, then head out to ride the ambulance for a little while.

This is looking good!

I got the much anticipated email this afternoon: I was granted admission into the University that I had applied to as a non-degree seeking student. Now, I can see about taking my courses :o) Another thought popped into my mind...what about - what about a post-bacc program? I think those are only full-time during the day though.

P.S The book I ordered came in the mail this afternoon: "Wound Care and Management." Guess what I'm doing tonight !! Reading myself to sleeeeppp

National Singles Awareness Day

Lets think about this: Last year this time I was out to dinner with my bf at a high end asian restaurant on south beach. Yea, the kind of place that serves $17 mixed fruity drinks and entrees that are the size of a dime. Very tasty, nonetheless. This year, I'm sitting on my couch, barefoot with my sweats on watching TV. At least I treated myself to an orgasmic facial this afternoon. Boy, I needed that.

I'll be the first to admit, it does kind of spoil the fun when you dont have anyone to be with on V-day. Oh well, such is life.

The weather is starting to get a little nice... I was thinking of taking my new bike out for a spin this eve, but after my royal facial, I didnt think it was a good idea to sweat all over the place and ruin the glamour.

After I finish updating, I think I"m going to download another book. The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks. I keep on hearing worlds of good stuff about that one. I'm in the middle of a book called the Dissapearing Spoon. In a nutshell, it's about....the periodic table. Yes, the periodic table. It has it's colorful parts, but I'm starting to run into a lot of dull pits and it's getting on my nerves.

Thats all I've got. Oh, I managed to temporarily shut down an entire gas station when I accidentally pulled away with the gas nozzle still in my car. Oops. The guy said that because of that, the entire system had to shut down and reboot. My bad. :( I think I was still in a happy coma after that facial/massage and wasnt thinking straight.

Waiting game

I called the University that I had applied to asking about the status of my application. It's been a little longer than expected and I still hadnt heard from them. As it turns out - my fault - I was missing some documentation. Of course I took care of it immediately. So I should get news in about two weeks. :)

IF all goes well, I'm going to jump on taking my courses. Let the games begin! I cant wait.

9

It's been weeks and weeks and I've still been waiting for my paperwork to get processed. Once it all goes through, then i'll have my county EMT IM number. I'll need that to officially become affiliated with a station. I've been riding with a station called 899, but its a startup station and we havent had any techs come through regularly so taking the unit out has been far and few between. I think if things dont pick up soon, 899 is not going to last too much longer. Sad but true. Ironically, I got a call from a station that I visited months ago when I first started taking my EMT class. Bladensburg Station 9. I really liked riding with them, everyone was nice, and they seemed to have a decent call volume. Only problem was, my paperwork kinda got stuck in a grey area, I got discouraged, and never really looked back.

They called this afternoon, apparently they had some changing of the guard and asked if I was still interested. I hope I"m not burning bridges, but I said I am interested. Going there this weekend, so we'll see what happens. It's a bit of a drive - 40min - but I remember thats how long it took me to drive to school everyday back in college, so I think i can manage a few times a month.

:)

Dr. Captain

I've been thinking about my volunteering. It's been a few years since I've been fully immersed in any volunteering. In fact, I'm not quite sure what it was I did last... I can always dig for one of my old resumes. Thats the thing though - I cant remember and thats not a good thing. I suppose since Im a volunteer EMT, thats a big thing. Is that "enough" ? Better than nothing obviously. But I know myself. I know my drive. I want to do more and more and more until I either have no time for anything else or something else pops up that I MUST do.


During my lab meeting yesterday, they mentioned that when the weather gets nicer, it'd be a good idea to get involved at the Downtown Sailing Club. Why? Because in the physical therapy department at work, they (not "we" because I dont work in clinical research or therapy) have a sailing simulator for the patients. I dont know much about the clinical studies but they explained that it has something do so with helping the patients exercise their balance and dexterity, use their muscles, and practice coordination. I havent done any sailing in years so maybe I can kill two birds with one stone. :) I'll post that when the time comes.


Still waiting to hear about the college I applied to...hoping I can register for summer classes!

School Update

I've applied to a local university for the summer semester as a non-degree seeking student. Progress!! So if all goes well, I'll be starting in March - I think. I'm not sure exactly when. Nevertheless, I'll know in the next few weeks what my plans are.

I'm feeling much better about all this. It just feels...right. Nothing is guaranteed of course, but the feeling going into this is ten times better than i had before. :)

For some reason im in the mood for a bacon wrapped sirloin.


We havent been riding the buggy lately and it's starting to drive me nuts. It seems like they arent able to get a tech to ride with us. It's a little disheartening when I have my new certification and cant use it yet. I still am waiting for my county ID number too so that'll be a good day when it comes in the mail. I just have to wait until the paperwork goes through first. Ahh the waiting game...

Pre-req update

I backtracked a little bit and went to my alma maters website. I needed to take a peek at my transcript. I had to see what year it was when I first started taking my science courses, and of course take a look at what grades I had.. :( Scary, but I had to do it... Anyhow, I started class in 2002 and my latest (after I graduated and came back for round 2) was in 2009. I emailed a local SOM and she said courses shouldnt be older than 10 years.

10 years.

Okay, well this was only one college. (And it's probably one college that I have zero chance of getting into.) My point is this: instead of driving myself nuts and possibly doing more than I have to - or not enough, I should check the "expiration date" of pre-reqs at other colleges. I'd better get a darn good feel for the timeline I"m working with before I get started.



...IF I get started..to make things more interesting, I'm having a hard time finding evening classes. I work full time and need - NEED - to take these courses after 5pm... I think I might be back to the drawing board.

2011

Happy New Year!!!!!!